Wednesday, January 18, 2017

Week 1 Story: The Dreadful Journey

The Cabin in the Middle of the Woods
Source: FineArtAmerica

In an attempt to escape the chaos and noise of the city, the Smith’s decided to rent a cabin in the woods during the holiday season. The Smith’s loved the outdoors and openness in the woods but they were forced to live in a big city because of their jobs. They were recently married and were eager to have their first real vacation together in the isolated cabin.

The Smith’s loaded up in their car are drove as close as they could get to the cabin. They hit a dead end in the road and pulled over into a small dirt parking spot. A small wooden sign with the paint peeling off pointed towards a trail and was labeled with the cabin's name. They had read that the cabin was located about a mile west of the dead end road and that they would have to hike through the forest to reach it. They strapped on their hiking boots, took their backpacks and hit the trail eager to reach their cabin getaway.

The trail was a narrow, dirt path in which could only be walked single file. Mr. Smith lead the way using his ax clearing the path as he went to ease the hike for his wife as she was not quite as outdoorsy as him. After hiking only a few minutes, Mrs. Smith became paranoid hearing the rattling of what she suspected was a rattlesnake. The couple had decided to move a little quicker in order to avoid any run-ins with snakes when an earthy toned rattlesnake looking to be about four feet long slithered across their path. They froze in fear hoping the snake would continue moving and pay them no attention when the snake paused, lifted up its head and looked them straight in the eye. The couple slowly began to move backwards when they realized another snake was located behind them and next to them. They were surrounded with nowhere to run.  Hearing his wife shriek, Mr. Smith decided he had to act. He grabbed his ax, took a deep breath, and swung at the rattlesnake in front of them slicing his head off and yelled “Run!” The couple took off down the path sprinting.

After a few minutes they slowed back down to a walk relieved that the snakes had not followed. The couple was now panting and sweating and even more eager to reach their destination. They walked at a brisk pace until through the trees off in the distance, they had the cabin in sight. They were so excited, relieved and exhausted that they both almost walked straight into a large, sticky mud puddle. They decided to leave the trail and venture out into the woods in order to get around the bog. They followed the dry land all the way around the bog until the cabin was back in sight. The couple took off at a full sprint through the forest until they reached the doors of the cabin. They had never been more excited to have reached a destination and more terrified for the trek back at the end of their vacation.

Authors Note: This story was inspired by Tom Gauld’s cartoon titled “Map of the Area Surrounding our Holiday Home. The cartoon shows a pictured of a cabin in the middle of the woods surrounded by many dreadful things. For my story, I began at the furthest eastern point and went in the direction of the cabin.

Bibliography: "Map of the Area Surrounding our Holiday Home," a cartoon by Tom Gauld from his book ROBOTS, MONSTERS Etc. Web source.

4 comments:

  1. This story was very well written! It seemed like it would be a good get-away vacation until the troubles started to happen. There was definitely a lot of build-up and detail in regards to the setting that made me actually visualize that I was there. I instantly knew that you were doing the "Map of the Area Surrounding our Holiday Home," when the cabin was mentioned. It also reminded me of one of the stories that I read when it said "Run!" Hopefully they do not have the same difficulties at the end of their vacation!

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  2. Your are a very good storyteller! The imagery and description you tell really gives the reader a picture in their head. In addition to imagery, the story also had great flow. It was not choppy and seemed very natural. I also enjoyed how you ended the story with somewhat of a cliffhanger; not knowing if the couple would make it back to their car or not.

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  3. Your story was so much fun to read. I was really grabbed by the detail that you provided, it helps to paint a picture in the readers head. I loved the moment Mr. Smith decided that he had to take action. I thought that it was very courageous and noble of him to take action. I was wondering what the snakes were doing in this part of the woods, or was it a particular season that would attract rattlesnakes? What if you maybe provided a little bit more detail about why the snakes were in the woods or described maybe why the snakes surrounded them in the way that they did? Overall your story was super interesting and I enjoyed your attention to detail.

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  4. I enjoyed this story and have actually been in a similar situation while out hunting, it was two rattlesnakes not three. I liked the plot around the couple trying to get away from the big city for on a vacation. I love being outdoors and can relate to this. I especially liked the part where the husband cut off the head of the snake. I would like more information as to why there were so many snakes out there or why they surrounded the people. Was it just random chance or were the snakes hunting? Also snakes heads are still alive for a few minutes even after being decapitated. It would have been awesome for the head to bite one of the people to add a bit more drama to the story. Would have ruined the vacation but would have made the story more intense. Overall it was a very well written story and I enjoyed reading it. Great job!

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